how's that for summarizing?

i'm taking a break.. for the last hour i've been trying to fabricate two short stories for a writing job i'm applying for (which sounded easy at first).. i thought it would be fun to at least send some samples in.. but now i'm exhausted.. my head hurts.. and i now realize that i am in-able to write in third person.. or not in-able.. but everything sounds cheesy when i write like that... anyway,, i'm about halfway through the first sample now..


I got a text message today:

typically when a person starts a new blog, said person posts shit on it...
come on slacker.

well here it is. soak it in.



maybe i'll tell a story..

maybe not.. i wrote the story out and didn't like it... so i'll summarize..

i was driving my motorcycle home one day.. and this girl was parked on the side of the road. i stopped to see if she was broke down but she wasn't.. she said that she was on her way to north carolina (i think).. and when i asked where she was coming from, she said california... in my head i was thinking,, "you didn't need to drive through texas"... but i didn't say anything.. also it was peculiar that she was out on this country road in between gorman and lake leon.. anyhow, she said everything was alright that she was just resting for a minute, so i was about to be on my way,, but she asked if i would take her for a ride. so,,,,, i did... she said she loved to ride. mind you,, i'm about eighteen.. i don't know how to talk to girls.. especially not hippie chicks from california.. i have no sisters.. all of my relationships up to this point had ended horribly... actually that still holds true today.. anyhow i was a little nervous.. she got on and i started down the road.. at about forty miles an hour she said i was going to fast and she was scared... she had obviously lied about liking motorcycles.. or she was on acid.. as that crossed my mind,, i began to remember a movie we watched in science class that said acid could be absorbed through human skin,, i became frightened that i would suddenly and unwantingly become high on lsd.... i should note,, that the only drugs i had ingested in my eighteen years was hydrocodon (which i loved) and weed,, which i could live without... anyhow the girl was beginning to really worry me.. she wasn't good at riding.. she kept fighting me in the corners.. and my unconcious mind was playing tricks,,, i kept checking for signs of what i had believed would constitute "tripping".... it was a real wreck of a time.. anyhow,,, i got her back to the station wagon and hurriedly said i had to get home... she asked if i wanted to join her on the trip to tennessee or wherever the hell she was going.. and i said no,,, i didn't want to go to tennesee.. she asked me where i would want to go.. i was really getting nervous now.. I said "nowhere",, and that i just wanted to go home.. i started the bike and sped off. shortly after i noticed a station wagon in my mirror.. smartly,, i passed the turn to my house,, thinking that i didn't want her knowing where i lived.. also i could just see the following conversation with my mom.. so i was going to find a place to turn and then double back and go home... but she was gaining on me.. my stupid bike only went sixty and her station wagon obviously had more umph than that... i cursed aloud.. i decided to beat her on the turn around.. i quickly stoped and pulled a one foot direct turn around in the middle of the road,, there was no way she could turn that boat around and head the opposite direction as i did.. as i passed her she shot me the peace sign out the window and her brake lights came on.... i had that little bike wound out as fast as it would go.. i dove off on my road and didn't let up until i got home,, and then i drove all the way around to the back yard and parked in the tool shed.. i waited a few minutes to see if she had seen me turn,, but she never appeared.. i never saw her again.. what a relief..


now,, over the past seven years or so since "the incident",, it's come to mind on occasion,, and i've always wondered how i might have handled it differently,, had it occurred in different phases of my life.. for example,, just a year later,, i probably would have tried to sell her some coke.. a year after that i might have jumped in the station wagon and sailed that boat all the way around the U.S... a couple years after that i might have tried to seduce her,, maybe another time around i would have jew'ed her for all the drugs she had in the car,, and probably any cash too,, under the false pretenses that i could get us more drugs,, but eventually left her high and dry on the side of the ditch while i sit on a dirt road a couple miles from the dope house dumping out the contents of capsule form vitamins so that i might fill them with meth and later take them at my discretion without the fear of being caught.. one of my old favorite past-times.. or perhaps a different me might have invited her to an AA meeting,, or insisted that jesus loves her.. high or not.. tennessee or not.. another me might have just kept riding.. and avoided the whole situation all together..

today??? i don't know.. i think today,, there would be no f'in way i'd be on a motorcycle in the first place.. i hate cold weather,, and i especially hate riding in cold weather,, although i've been forced to do it several times... but now that i think about it,, i don't have much tolerance for hippies anymore.


be glad i didn't write the long form..